


Fast Fuse 3: Hang You From The Heavens

by attachedtothebevs



Series: Fast Fuse [3]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Danvin (mentioned), M/M, Mavin, RageHappy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-13
Updated: 2013-06-30
Packaged: 2017-12-14 21:38:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/841661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/attachedtothebevs/pseuds/attachedtothebevs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are no winners in an incredibly high-stakes game where "no" is sometimes "yes" and "I hate you" means something different entirely.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Michael was just passing by the lobby when someone rang the bell to the front door. He looked around and saw that nobody was there to answer it, so he did.  
“Good morning, flower delivery for Mister Ray Narvaez?”  
“Oh, thanks.” Michael took the big bouquet of red roses. It had a little card attached to it but he didn’t care who it was from, he just plucked a single rose and made his way back to the Achievement Hunter office.  
“Ray, you’ve got flowers.” The man all but tossed the bouquet across the room and hopped on Gavin’s desk, holding a rose between his teeth, and wiggled his eyebrows.  
“Aw!” Gavin chuckled, taking the offered flower and giving Michael a little peck on the cheek. “When are you gonna start giving me jewelry and buying me trips to the Bahamas?” the Brit teased, sniffing the rose.  
“I’ll give you a pearl necklace if you want.” Michael had the most wicked grin plastered on his face.  
It took about a second for the statement to sink in, but the whole office groaned out loud and Gavin burst out laughing.  
“Jesus fucking Christ, Michael! Five dollars in the jar, right now. That was disgusting.” Geoff commanded, pointing to the jar nearly full of money on his desk.  
About a few weeks into Gavin and Michael’s relationship, when they started to feel more comfortable around other people, Geoff gave them a few rules to follow: no domestics and no PDA during work hours. Obviously everyone was fine if sometimes they had a little sidebar going on while everyone worked, or if they kissed hello/goodbye, but anything obnoxious resulted in a dollar in the jar.  
Soon enough they’d do it just to wind up Geoff, a few dollars completely worth seeing him annoyed.  
Michael took his wallet out, scrunched up a 20, and threw it in the general direction of Geoff’s desk. “Here, have that.” He leaned down and kissed Gavin fully on the mouth, a firm hand clutching at the back of his head. That earned a howl from Ray and an even louder groan from Geoff.  
When Michael pulled away, Gavin was flushed and a bit shaky. He’d clutched at the rose with both his hands and had a few pinpricks on his palms from the thorns. They both looked down at the little droplets of blood on his hands, and Gavin took a deep breath, trying to steady himself.  
Michael put the rose on the desk and gently took both of Gavin’s hands, bringing them to his mouth. He kissed the tiny wounds and made him yelp.  
Completely worth it.  
x x x  
Gavin was sprawled across Michael’s lap, lazily playing with his curls with one hand and hugging an almost-empty bottle of whiskey with the other. They’d gone out to dinner with a few friends and decided they wanted to end the evening with getting a bit drunk on Michael’s couch, watching inane shows on TV.  
“You know,” the redhead said out of nowhere. “You never told me how you learned to give such masterful blowjobs.” There was a certain level of mocking in his voice, a sly smirk dancing on his lips.  
At that point Gavin was just drunk enough to actually tell the story.  
“When I was in school I met this girl, Lily.” The Brit sunk back into the couch even more, getting comfortable. Michael casually rested his hands on Gavin’s thighs, drawing little invisible designs with his fingers. “I fancied her a bit, but she had had a boyfriend since she was like thirteen. Dylan.” The Brit smiled fondly as he said the name and immediately Michael’s knee-jerk reaction was to tense up. Gavin didn’t notice though, he just carried on with the story.  
Gavin told him about how Lily and Dylan were “the perfect couple”. They were the popular kids in school, always had been. Everyone envied their years-long relationship as most school romances barely lasted a few months, but they power-coupled their way through all of it. However, soon after graduation their relationship started to crumble.  
“I don’t know what happened to make them realize that something wasn’t right, after so long.” Gavin reminisced.  
Lily and Gavin had been great friends all those years and there had always been tension, but the girl was too loyal and Gavin was too afraid of Dylan to do anything about it. “He’s very sporty, he’d go to the gym like four times a week, lifting weights and that. Very strong.” They were on good terms but it wasn’t like they’d ever hang out, just the two of them.  
“To be honest I didn’t have anything in common with Lily, but we were sat next to each other in class for most of school, so I guess we just got comfortable. That, and she was really fit.” Gavin winked and laughed when Michael gave him a glare.  
“Anyway, school ended and we didn’t really hang out all that much, we kinda drifted apart. But like half a year later Lily called me and invited me out for drinks with her and Dylan.”  
Drinks were had and conversations yelled over loud, repetitive club music. There was something strange about every interaction, but at the time Gavin just chalked it up to not having seen each other for a while. “I got a bit drunk and took Lily out onto the floor to dance.” The Brit had a look of concentration on his face, obviously trying to remember details.  
“We were dancing, and… I don’t know, she just looked so hot, and she was all over me.” Gavin started talking a little bit faster.  
Lily kissed him, arms wrapped around his neck. Somewhere in the back of his head he knew that Dylan was watching them, but it was so hard to care. Right up until he felt a big hand on his shoulder and the chill of fear shot down his spine. Gavin was dead sure he was about to get the beating of his lifetime, but nothing could have shocked him more than the moment he felt Dylan pressing up against his back and planting a tiny, tentative kiss on the side of his neck.  
“It was the weirdest thing ever,” Gavin stared at the ceiling. He remembered how the initial shock kept him from running away and how he decided to see it through when he realized how exciting the whole thing was. Being involved in a threesome when you’re just out of school was quite an achievement. What he didn’t realize at the time was that light-hearted experimenting would lead to so much drama and shocking revelations.  
Gavin remembered that even then, when he had Lily in his arms, he noticed how Dylan’s stubble felt against his skin, how he handled him just a bit on the rough side and how hard it made him.  
“We ended up in their flat,” The Brit stated. “And then it happened next week, too. And the week after that.” he was so lost in the story he didn’t even notice the strange look on Michael’s face.  
“Then one weekend Dylan called me and invited me out, and I thought Lily would be there too, but she wasn’t. He told me that they had a big fight and she went to her parent’s.” Gavin furrowed his eyebrows. “Anyway yeah, turned out that Dylan was gay and Lily was so embarrassed she left town.”  
“How did she not notice he liked getting his dick sucked by a guy?” Michael spoke for the first time.  
Gavin giggled. “Oh no, it wasn’t like that. I kinda… ended up dating him for a bit after that.”  
“Oh.”  
“Yeah… It didn’t work out, obviously. And months later I actually found out that Lily had had a crush on me for years and that she was the one who suggested a threesome with me. It’s all really messed up. I don’t think she knows I dated Dylan after the whole thing.”  
Gavin rattled on about their escapades and eventually Michael had to kiss him to shut him up.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crawl back into bed  
> Tomorrow's trembling at the sight  
> of you and I

As annoyed as it made Michael when Gavin stole the clothes he was going to wear or left the fridge door cracked open because he never pushed it hard enough, there were definite upsides to him staying over most nights of the week.  
Like the time Michael woke up in a daze only to realize that Gavin was riding him, slowly and quietly, his skin shining with sweat in the already way too hot morning sun, pouring into the bedroom.  
“Hey, Gav.” He whispered, lightly running his fingers down his thigh.  
“Shhh…” Gavin’s head was tilted back, eyes closed. He rolled his hips to a beautifully maddening rhythm and all Michael could do was stare at him, at his exposed neck, at his exquisite collar bones, at how his chest rose and fell ever more erratically as he got himself off, matching his own movements.  
Michael wasn’t at all involved in the process, all he had to do was lie back and enjoy. He probably should have felt more used than he did, but it was really hard to find anything negative about waking up already halfway to an orgasm.  
He must have been sleeping like the dead through most of it because he felt that he was close, and he knew Gavin was, too. He always had this look about him right before he came, his cheeks would flush and it would spread all the way down his chest.  
When he came, he didn’t stop moving and rode out his orgasm with the most serene look on his face, making Michael lose it shortly after, too.  
Gavin didn’t move just yet though, instead he stayed on top of him, eyes closed, panting and looking lovely for a little while. When whatever experience he was having settled, he smirked and cracked an eye open.  
“Morning, Michael.” Gavin crooned and lied down next to him. He reached over to the bedside table and grabbed a few tissues to clean his hands up. Eventually he made himself comfortable and just lied there on his side, looking back at Michael who had been watching him the entire time. Gavin’s eyes were half-lidded and shone with a kind of rare calmness to them. Contentment. Bliss, even.  
When he was being so quiet and affectionate it was hard for Michael not to match it. He just studied Gavin’s face as he gently played with his hair and ran the tip of his finger along his jaw and lips and cheekbones. Gavin leaned into his touch, and that’s as much encouragement as he needed to carry on.  
“I love it when you’re like this.” Michael murmured, careful not to shatter the atmosphere.  
“Like what?”  
He just shrugged and leaned in to kiss him, but Gavin moved back an inch. “Don’t, I have morning breath.”  
Michael laughed and pulled him into a kiss that was very different from their usual kisses. Unhurried, gentle and deliberate, they said everything they wanted to without actually using words, because those can very easily betray and why say anything if all that you want to convey can be loaded into a kiss so sweet that the outside world ceases to exist and all they were left with was the feeling of skin against skin and the warmth of the rising Texas sun.  
x x x  
Geoff was trying to sleep off a wicked headache on the couch when Gavin found himself fairly drunk, lying on the ground, looking up at the ceiling and talking about sex with Griffon.  
“So who’s top and who’s bottom?” she asked, and if it were anyone else in the world it would have been weird. But Griffon was the coolest girl Gavin had ever met and they spoke in such a way that he knew she wasn’t being rude or making fun. It was night and they were talking, and it just happened to be about sex.  
Gavin turned his head to make eye contact and gave her a look.  
“Yeah I thought so, though I bet Michael would like it, too. Is he cuddly after?”  
The Brit mulled over what she’d said before answering. “I think he is. He’s always making fun of me for having to hold onto something while I sleep but I think he’d miss it if I didn’t.”  
“If I’d known earlier that you’re actually into dudes I would have been a little worried about all the times I found you and Geoff curled up on the couch having a nap.”  
Gavin flashed her a wicked smile. “I’ll go have a nap with your husband right now, just watch me. It’ll be the best bloody nap he’s ever had.”  
“I can fucking hear you.” Geoff grumbled from across the room, clearly only half-asleep.  
The two chuckled and continued their conversation in whispers. Griffon ran a finger down Gavin’s neck, lightly touching the numerous hickeys. Pretty much everyone in the office had seen them at some point and usually he’d try and hide them to avoid comments, but if he was just hanging around with the Ramseys, he didn’t bother. “Michael’s a biter, huh?”  
The Brit shivered under her touch and let out a breathy little “yes.”  
“Oooh, a bit kinky then, are we?”  
Gavin couldn’t help but smirk. “Remember that Sunday a couple weeks ago when I didn’t go out with you because I said I was sick and couldn’t get out of bed? Yeah, I wasn’t, I just couldn’t move.” Griffon giggled. “I’m pretty sure I had internal bleeding or somethin’, Michael did me _good_.”  
“Oh my god.” Geoff’s borderline hysterical voice came from the couch. “I’m gonna go kill myself.” He stood up and left the room, covering his ears with his hands as if that was going to make him un-hear the conversation.  
“What’s your safeword?” Griffon asked when she heard the bedroom door slam shut.  
“My what?”  
Gavin could see her eyes go wide in the dimly-lit room. “You don’t have a safeword?”  
“No?”  
Griffon pinched his ear really hard and started twisting it, making him writhe around on the ground. “Hey! Cut it out!”  
“What’s the safeword?”  
“Alright, alright! Point taken.”  
Griffon gave him a long lecture about safety, trust and communication (also inadvertently giving him an insight into her and Geoff’s sex life) and made him promise to discuss it with Michael.  
Gavin kept his promise and brought it up at dinner a couple days later, making Michael choke on his food.  
“A safeword?”  
“Yeah, so that like… if I say “stop” or something, you know that I don’t really mean it.” The Brit was blushing, but he knew they had to settle this. Gavin could tell Michael was thinking of the same things he was – those couple times when Gavin would scream and shout and Michael would get freaked out, thinking he’d gone too far. Or the one time he did and felt cripplingly guilty for days.  
“Okay… Do you have anything in mind?”  
“This is so stupid, but the first thing that popped into my head when I was talking with Griffon—“  
“Wait, what? You were talking about this with Griffon?”  
“Yeah, a bit.”  
Michael took a deep breath, closed his eyes and shook his head. “What’s the word?”  
Gavin blushed, eyes downcast. “Mogar. I know it’s silly but that’s the first thing I thought of and now I can’t think of anything—“ His rambling was cut short by Michael’s laugh, loud and cheerful. Gavin was flustered for all of a second until he walked over from where he was sitting at the table and gave him a kiss on the cheek.  
“I love it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to tell me what you think! I love hearing your thoughts <3 xx


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fear of an enemy, a hand to a face  
> Words I overhear  
> Stop starting histories, a code in a look  
> What's that number?
> 
> Crazed by my make believe, a tongue down a throat  
> The grip on your arse  
> Tales that you tell to me, a touch of your nose  
> Why did you stammer?

“So what do you do?” A beautiful blonde girl was leaning against the bar, slowly stirring her drink with a straw, looking up at Gavin through her long lashes. He was fully turned away from Michael, chatting to her, engaged. He noticed the girl had her delicate, pampered hand gently resting on the Brit’s knee. Michael could swear he could see Gavin leaning into it, his hand just inches from hers.   
“Oh, I work for this internet company.”   
“Fascinating.” She wasn’t interested in the least. “Are you with someone?”   
Michael wanted to scream. “I think it’s time we go home.”  
Gavin whipped around. “What? It’s not even midnight yet!” His protests were cut short by Michael roughly grabbing his forearm and dragging him out of the building.  
“Michael!”  
“Shut up.” The man commanded, setting a fast pace towards his apartment. Once they finally made it in, he shut the door forcefully behind them.  
“Why do you have to be such a goddamn slut?” Michael yelled, fists clenched at his sides.  
“What are you on about?” Gavin’s voice was teetering on the edge of anger.  
“That whole fucking thing with the girl! I was right there and you didn’t give a fuck! You just flirted back!” Michael was getting red in the face and every time the Brit opened his mouth to talk, he’d just continue yelling. “If you’re like that when I’m around, what the fuck do you do when I’m not? Do you just let girls flock around you and your sexy British accent?” He mocked.  
“Michael, calm down.”  
“No! I’m fucking tired of going to bars with you and seeing every fucking girl eyeing you and you just go with it because you’re a fucking world-class whore.”  
And that was the first time Gavin slapped Michael.   
Not too hard, but enough so that his head whipped to the side and his eyes went wide.   
“Don’t you fucking make this about me, you cunt.” Gavin spat with venom. “This is about you and your insane jealousy issues. You have a problem.”  
The second Michael snapped out of the shock of being hit, he grabbed Gavin by the throat and slammed him into the nearest wall, holding him pinned with just one hand. “Yeah, I have a fucking problem! It’s _you,_ you fucking _slut._ ”  
Gavin gathered all his energy to get words out of is constricted throat. “You’d have me on a leash if I let you. God forbid someone else plays with your toys.” He choked out.  
Somehow, in the heat of the moment, the intended insult translated into something entirely different in Michael’s brain.   
He closed the space between them and crushed his lips against Gavin’s, hearing a winded little “oomph” when he let go of his throat and dug his nails into his hips instead.   
Gavin was unresponsive and tensed up, holding his lips tightly shut and trying to push him away, instinctively knowing that Michael had taken what he’d said as some sort of twisted challenge, an invitation to prove something neither of them could quite put into words.  
He struggled, trying with all his might to shove him away but all of it went out the window when Michael’s hands made their way to his ass, digging his nails into the soft flesh and pulling him closer. Gavin felt his dick, already half hard, against his own thigh, and a familiar feeling shot down his lower abdomen. He accidentally gasped and Michael took the opportunity to stick his tongue halfway down Gavin’s throat. He gave in and kissed back – if you could call it kissing. It was all teeth and clawing at each other, trying to prove a point that got lost between swollen lips and choked-back curses.  
Michael maneuvered them out of the living room and shoved Gavin onto the edge of the bed. He made quick work of their zippers and all but tore both of their jeans off, throwing them on the floor. Gavin didn’t even have time to comprehend what was happening when Michael spit into his hand and pumped his own cock a couple of times before hooking both of Gavin’s legs over his arms and positioning himself.  
“Michael—“  
He thrust into Gavin, completely unprepared, and the Brit let out a pained scream.   
Even though Michael’s mind was wiped that particular second, one very clear thought made its way through the fog. He remembered the conversation they’d had a while ago and he stopped when he was fully in.  
“What’s my name?”  
Gavin opened his eyes, still frowning at the sensation, and he shot him a glare so powerful Michael almost recoiled.  
“ _Michael._ Don’t you worry, I can fucking take it.”   
Something about Gavin’s stubbornness lit every nerve ending on fire. Michael almost completely pulled out and then started ramming into him, hard and fast, relishing in the winded sounds he was making.   
When Gavin reached down between them and circled his fingers around his own cock, Michael grabbed his arm and pinned it to the bed.   
What Michael didn’t anticipate was that he’d take that as a challenge. In Gavin’s head it made perfect sense. Somehow, he reasoned to himself, whoever came first - won. So he made himself relax and crossed his arms underneath his head, closing his eyes.  
Gavin looked like he was lying on a goddamn beach soaking up the sun, Michael thought. He put more force into it, now fucking him like his life depended on it. He was close, maddeningly so, the delicious friction was driving him insane and he couldn’t help but look down at Gavin, a smirk dancing on his slightly open lips, moving with every breath Michael fucked out of him.   
It was a testament to the power of Gavin’s mind when minutes later he tensed up and came all over his own stomach, happily sighing at the downright comical look on Michael’s face. What the redhead hadn’t realized was that when he leaned down to get a different angle, it created just enough friction between them for Gavin to get off; that and obviously the Brit’s competitive nature couldn’t let him lose a bet – even if it was all in his own head. Which clearly it wasn’t, apparently Michael had caught on, and when he saw the pleased look on Gavin’s face, he thought he might actually rip the skin off his skull.   
Michael pulled out, grabbed him and turned him around, slamming his face into the covers and locking both his wrists behind his back. He could swear he heard Gavin’s muffled laugh and that just unlocked a whole new level of legitimate, actual rage. Michael could hear the blood rushing in his ears as he continued to hammer into him, each thrust fueled with a kind of profound frustration that only Gavin could elicit.   
Michael grabbed him by the hair and pulled him up so that they were touching chest-to-back, he could hear Gavin’s ragged breaths and feel him, sweaty and hot and – impossibly – laughing. Breathless and cocky, he dropped his head back.  
“Come on, my little Michael.” His voice was sickeningly sweet and Michael could imagine the look on his face.   
That was the last straw. He whipped Gavin around and roughly pushed him down on his knees. Michael held the back of his head in a death grip, and with the other hand he jacked himself off.  
“I fucking hate you.” He managed to say right before he came, all over Gavin’s face. The little shit licked off what he could reach and rubbed off what had gotten near his eyes.   
“I hate you too, Michael.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two need to sit the fuck down and chill the hell out. 
> 
> Don't forget to tell me what you think xx


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usually I like to wait at least a couple days before uploading a new chapter but hey, fuck it, I already have it written. Enjoy x

Michael was hyper aware of everything around him. He heard snippets of conversations and announcements read through the speakers as he followed Gavin through the airport, looking at his back and trying not to trip in his haste to keep up. There were a lot of people, way too many, and they weaved through the crowd. Gavin was stepping on toes left and right, leaving Michael, of all people, to apologize as he was rushing after him.   
Michael could tell he was tense by the way he moved. It was surreal seeing Gavin like this, he was usually almost too relaxed.   
About three crushed toes and a spilled drink later, Michael could physically see the tension being broken with two simple words.  
“Hey, B.” he heard the disconcertingly attractive voice say and he watched Gavin all but melt into his arms.  
“Dan.” He said simply and Michael couldn’t tear his eyes off the hand clutching at the back of his boy’s neck. He took a deep breath and tried to steady himself. Don’t be an asshole. They’re just friends. Don’t be jealous. They’ve known each other for years. Just don’t. It’s fine.   
The two just stood there in silence for a while, Gavin’s arms around Dan’s waist and his wrapped around protectively around Gavin, right hand still resting on the nape of his neck, making little movements.  
When they finally let go, Dan went in for a friendly handshake/half-hug with Michael. They both seemed to abruptly snap out of their little trance at the same time, and suddenly they were both talking, loud and animated, making dinner plans and discussing what to do when.  
Michael had never witnessed Gavin change states so fast. One minute he was stressed (even though he had no real reason to be), the next he was an emotional ragdoll held up by sheer will power, and then just as suddenly he was back to normal, joking around and making sarcastic comments as they made their way through the airport.  
He couldn’t shake the feeling of having walked into something very intimate and private. They didn’t do anything, they just hugged, but just the way Dan held him and the look on Gavin’s face for that one minute they let themselves be open and… vulnerable, even, but only to each other, only for a little bit… Michael had only seen him like that a handful of times.  
Gavin called shotgun and spent the whole way back to the Ramsey’s with his spine twisted at an unnatural angle so that he could talk to Dan while Michael drove them. He tried to be gentle with Geoff’s car but he was tense, so he took a few corners at an unreasonable speed and almost made Gavin bang his head against the window.   
Michael didn’t mean to, though. His knee-jerk reaction was absent, he didn’t feel angry or jealous, he was just sad.   
He knew it was stupid and selfish but he couldn’t help but feel like that. Like he couldn’t bear the thought of Gavin looking like that at anyone else in the world. Like he wanted him all to himself and it killed him every time he could see Dan’s hand in his periphery, squeezing Gavin’s shoulder, hearing their laughter. The rational part of his brain kept insisting that it didn’t mean anything, that they just missed each other and that this had always been how they interacted – like they were attached by some invisible cord and sometimes they were annoyed by it and played tug of war, and other times it was the only reliable thing in the universe, keeping them up.  
And that’s really what it boiled down to – Michael knew that if they broke up, Gavin would be fine. He’d probably mope around for a couple of weeks but ultimately he’d be alright.  
Michael, on the other hand, couldn’t say the same for himself. He didn’t have anyone to keep him up, to not let him crumble.   
Just thinking about it made his hair stand on end, and he had no idea at what exact point his life did a complete 180. He realized, to his dismay, just how much he depended on Gavin to keep him sane. Which was unfortunate because Gavin also just so happened to be the only person in the goddamn world capable of sending him spiraling into insanity at the drop of a hat.   
x x x  
Michael managed to somehow coax Ray out of his apartment and come over to Geoff’s where everyone was having drinks. The main attraction of the night was obviously Dan, everyone wanted to hear his stories. Gavin was predictably hovering around him like a satellite, drawn in by the gravitational pull of his easy charm. He had to admit, watching those two interact was pure comedy, and just like Burnie said when he stood next to him and Ray, sipping on his drink and watching Gavin and Dan drunkenly reenact some sort of fight scene and subsequently hurt each other by accident – they were lovable idiots. And the only thing that kept Michael grounded was the fact that at the end of the day, Gavin was his lovable idiot.   
He couldn’t help but be a little possessive at times though. Michael would walk up to Gavin and snake an arm around his waist, pulling him close, and much to his relief Gavin would nuzzle against him, if only for a second, and then continue talking, completely unfazed by the domineering gesture. Dan would eye them but there wasn’t anything malicious in his gaze; he was just observing.   
Dan asked him something and Michael answered, only half paying attention because he was distracted by the way he said his name. Michael always thought that the way Gavin always said his name was just the product of his accent, and even though when Dan said it, it sounded similar, but not at all the same. He felt comforted, for some reason, by the fact that Gavin had his own unique way of saying his name, laughed at and teased relentlessly as it may be, but Michael had always loved it.   
It was a relatively quiet get-together, nobody got hammered, just pleasantly drunk, and at some point in the night someone left, and naturally within half an hour everyone went home. Geoff insisted Dan stay but the Brit was having none of it, instead calling a cab and going to the hotel he’d booked. Gavin didn’t even try to help Geoff convince him to stay, he knew how stubborn about things like these he was. Dan hated feeling like he was imposing.  
Griffon, Geoff, Michael and Gavin saw him off with promises to meet up tomorrow morning and started cleaning up, picking up empty bottles and plates.   
“Go now if you’re gonna shower before bed, I hate it when you make the pillow all wet.” Gavin said as he busied himself with the dishes.   
“Oh, I’m staying over?”  
“Yeah, of course. I mean, unless you don’t want to?”  
“No, no, I do. I just thought you didn’t want me to.”  
Gavin furrowed his eyebrows and dried his hands before walking up to Michael who was standing by the counter. They were alone in the kitchen, Geoff and Griffon had already headed to sleep when Gavin told them he’d finish cleaning up.   
“Why wouldn’t I want you to stay over?”  
Michael just shrugged, looking down at the ground. Gavin gently placed his palms on his cheeks and directed his gaze so that they were looking eye to eye.   
“You’ve been acting weird, Michael. Is everything alright?” with the way Gavin was looking at him, it was really hard to lie and say everything was okay.   
“Yeah, I just… missed you, I don’t know. It’s stupid.”   
“I’m right here, Michael.”   
“I know.”  
“Come on.” Gavin hugged him tight, pressing himself up against him and rubbing calming little circles on his back. “Let’s go to sleep and then tomorrow we can go have your favorite doughnuts for breakfast, just you and me. Okay?”  
Very reasonable, very reassuring, but still Michael felt a little knot in his chest.   
“Michael. Hey, look at me. I’m yours, okay? As much as I hate it sometimes,” Gavin smirked a little, albeit with a bitter edge. “I’m yours. You don’t have to be jealous or anything.”  
“I can’t help it.”  
“Is it because of Dan? I saw how you looked at him at the airport. You could have at least tried to be subtle.” Gavin giggled.  
“Sorry…” Michael muttered.   
“And anyway he’s probably jealous of _you,_ if anything.”  
Michael pulled away and studied Gavin’s face, trying to understand what he meant.   
“Oh god, have you slept with him, too?”  
The Brit immediately realized that he dug himself in a hole halfway to China.   
“Define _‘slept with.’_ ”  
“ _Christ,_ Gavin!”  
“Don’t be jealous, please, it’s not like that.”  
“Not like what?”  
“I don’t know! My point is, ugh… We’re just friends, okay? I’m pretty sure he has a girlfriend back in England. And anyway it was a long time ago and we were drunk and it was just mates mucking about, nothing happened because we didn’t _want_ anything to happen and—”  
It was late at night, Michael was exhausted and an involuntary little chuckle escaped his lips at Gavin’s blabbering. The more he knew about him, the more terrified it made him, but there was also a weird sense of comfort in knowing all of his little misadventures.   
“Is there _anyone_ in England you haven’t screwed?”  
Gavin examined his face, trying to assess whether this would flare up into one of their (ever more frequent) insane fights or fizzle out into nothing and be swept under the bed to deal with later.  
“Prince Harry keeps ignoring my calls.”   
Michael sighed, shook his head and kissed Gavin for a second.   
“Anyone else I should know about?”  
He looked thoughtful for a second. “I once got Ray to drink tequila…”  
“ _What?!_ ”  
Gavin laughed, loud and cheerful. “I’m kidding!”  
“You’ll be the death of me, I swear to god.”  
The Brit chuckled and gave him a sweet little kiss. “You wouldn't have it any other way.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment! Nothing gets me more excited than seeing the little Inbox (1) notification xx


	5. Chapter 5

Michael had gone to get a glass of water when he got sidetracked by a very dapper looking, suited up Joel in the kitchen. They chatted about the short the crew was filming until Joel got called away and rushed out of the room. Michael noticed the man had left a prop pistol on the counter and called out to tell him, but just got a distant “Whatever!” from Joel.  
He took the gun and examined it. It was very good as far as props went – not only did it look realistic, it had a good weight to it as well. Michael looked at the prop in his hand and then towards the Achievement Hunter office as an idea formed.  
Michael made his way into the office. Geoff and Jack were in the middle of a game of Trials Evolution, too busy to pay any attention to what he was about to do. He walked over to Gavin, leaned in to his left so that their faces were shielded if Geoff were to turn around, and before Gavin realized what was happening, Michael jammed the gun into the side of his neck and firmly placed his right hand on his mouth.  
"Do you want to play?" Michael whispered in his ear, voice low and husky.  
He could feel Gavin squirming to see what Michael was holding against his neck, and he could almost hear his thought process when he noticed that it was a gun. He (probably) knew it was fake, but the reaction was delicious nonetheless. Gavin tensed up when he realized he couldn't speak, so he thought fast and pulled up a notepad window on his computer.  
 _wh ataare you doing_  
Michael didn't say anything, instead he just licked and nibbled at Gavin's left ear and dragged the prop gun against his neck ever more forcefully. He could feel Gavin swallow and tense up, his breath get irregular against his palm.  
 _please stop wereat work_  
"Don't say a word." Michael whispered and straightened up, letting him go and hiding the gun behind himself. "Hey Geoff, can we go to lunch early? I'm starving."  
"Yeah, whatever, just have those edits in by the end of the day." Geoff didn't even look away from the screen as he said it, too immersed in the game.  
"Will do, Boss."  
Michael gestured to Gavin to get up and followed him out of the building, all the while holding the gun against his lower back. Thankfully they managed to avoid bumping into anyone on their way to Michael's apartment. Gavin stayed quiet all the way there.  
Once they made it home, the Brit just stood there in the middle of the living room, not facing him, eagerly waiting for… something, anything.  
“Michael?”  
He grabbed Gavin’s hair and pulled it harshly. “Shut up. Go sit on the bed.”  
Michael went about looking for something to use to tie him up with and after a minute he really had no idea why he even bothered because he always ended up using the same things - a tie he never actually wore and a torn up T-shirt. He hadn’t yet decided if he was going to just tie Gavin’s hands or gag him as well, so he took both.  
He lingered outside the bedroom for a little while. Michael knew that when they played like this, half the fun for Gavin was the anticipation. He liked a bit of theatrics and Michael simply couldn’t mind because it would get him so riled up and beautiful and breathless that he didn’t feel stupid, putting on a bit of an act.  
“Take your clothes off.” He ordered when he finally walked into the bedroom.  
Gavin nodded quietly, undressed and sat back down to wait for further instructions. Michael pondered what he wanted to do with him as he just looked at him, naked and starting to blush under his gaze. He was still holding the pistol and saw Gavin eyeing it with a strange look on his face.  
Michael went about wordlessly scooting him up the bed and tying his wrists together and to the headboard. “Don’t make noises.” He positioned himself on top of Gavin and placed the gun next to his head.  
At that point, a plan of action had already formed in Michael’s mind. He started slow – first just kissing. He was always surprised by Gavin’s reactions when they kissed. Michael wasn’t one to put himself down but he knew he wasn’t the best at it, and yet Gavin never once complained, and in fact frequently complimented him on it. He had a very specific style and he thanked the stars every day that Gavin was exactly the same – they liked biting and sucking on each other’s tongues and anything at all that left their lips swollen and raw. Michael often found Gavin’s tongue halfway down his throat and that’s precisely where he wanted it to be.  
And so they kissed until Gavin started trying to free himself, craving for more contact. Michael let it happen, right up until a tiny, only half-intelligible little “Please…” escaped Gavin’s lips and in no time the torn up t-shirt made its way between his teeth, pretty tightly wrapped and tied around his head.  
Before he went on, Michael took his keys out of his pocket and placed them in Gavin’s palm. He, in turn, clutched them and nodded, answering the silent question. The jiggling of the keys was their safeword for when he couldn’t speak. If Michael would forget to give him something to hold on to, snapping his fingers was also a signal. The two talked it all out, as painfully awkward as it was, because making rules like that somehow made it far more serious than they maybe wanted it to be, but they had to be established to keep it from getting out of hand.  
Michael went down to bite and suck at his neck and shoulders, making Gavin increasingly squirmier. He started to whimper and buckle his hips up, longing for friction. Michael smacked the side of his hip. “Stop that.”  
He slowly worked his way down, making sure to pay attention to his nipples, swirling his tongue around each one and sucking. Michael even bit them slightly, very gently, just to give him the sensation of teeth tugging at his nipples, and it effectively made Gavin lose it that much more.  
Time stretched on and Gavin, without irony, thought that this was how slow motion in real life felt like. He tried to steady his breathing as Michael worked on every inch of his body he could reach, except one very, very important area.  
He groaned when Michael viciously bit the inside of his thigh, the sensitive flesh tingling as he then soothed it with his tongue.  
Gavin was getting to be so overstimulated and so turned on that any accidental brush against his dick made him whine, and when Michael finally, _finally_ turned his attention to it, Gavin felt just about ready to explode.  
Michael took the base of his cock firmly in his hand and licked up the side of it, earning a delicious moan from Gavin. The plan had been to keep him gagged until the end, but Michael decided against it because he sensed that Gavin was in a very satisfying state, ready to beg him for release. He got rid of the gag and set back to work.  
Gavin didn’t disappoint. He didn’t even have to be asked to beg. “Oh g-god, please, Michael… please.”  
Michael was sucking him off at a maddeningly slow pace and had a hand down his own pants because it was getting a little too much for him, too. Gavin thrust up into his mouth and then his backside met the bed with brute force when Michael shoved him down to keep him in place.  
He picked up the pace and worked him in all the ways he knew Gavin loved, taking him all in and sucking, then going up and swirling his tongue around the tip. One of their main differences in that aspect was that on most days Gavin’s gag reflex was a bit too sensitive to take all of Michael in, so he got crafty with his hands and lips and tongue, but Michael discovered he could deepthroat like a champ and he’d relish in the way that made Gavin lose it, eyes rolling back into his head and talking nonsense between moans. Michael noticed quite early on that his accent got a lot thicker during sex and he didn’t know if Gavin had any idea, but he never mentioned it. He wanted to keep that to himself, like a little secret.  
When he saw that Gavin was close, Michael sat up and straddled him. He replaced his mouth with his hand and took the gun in the other.  
“Why did you…”  
“I want to see you. Look me in the eyes.”  
“Oh god.” Gavin’s muscles were tense and he could feel himself teetering at the edge.  
“Open your mouth.”  
“Wha—“  
Michael jammed the gun into his mouth and, staring him straight into the eyes, cocked it.  
Gavin was pretty sure he went blind and deaf for a few seconds.  
“Oh god, oh god, Michael, Michael!” he kept panting as his muscles constricted, his wrists digging into the tie as he thrashed around in the throes of his orgasm.  
Once Gavin somewhat came down from his high, Michael rolled off him and finished himself off. It didn’t take too long even though he hadn’t paid much attention to himself, but just the satisfaction of being responsible for an orgasm like that went a long way.  
They stayed there in silence for a couple of minutes, trying to get their heart-rates back to normal.  
“Can you untie me?”  
“Oh, yeah, sorry.” Michael snapped out of it and scrambled to untie him. Once his arms were free, he stretched them for a second but then they fell back on the bed. He still felt like a jellyfish, unable to move.  
Michael looked at his watch. Nobody would know they took their time if they got back before those guys, so they still had around a half hour before everyone usually came back from lunch. “Have a fifteen minute nap, then a shower.” He reached over and swept Gavin’s hair away from where it had stuck to his sweaty forehead. “I’ll make you some coffee.” Michael kissed his shoulder and made a move to get out of bed, but Gavin’s hand stopped him.  
“Michael.”  
“Yeah?”  
Sometimes, just sometimes, Gavin would have this look on his face. And Michael could never tell what it was. It’d flash across his face for a second, sometimes when they were at the office, playing Minecraft and Michael would come to his rescue with his trusty diamond sword; sometimes when he yelled profanity at him for being stupid and annoying and fucking everything up; sometimes during sex when it was slow and sweet and intimate or others when Michael fucked him so hard he felt it for days.  
And finally, this time, it clicked and Michael understood what that look meant. He heard the words before Gavin said them, but they didn’t shock him any less.  
“I love you, Michael.”  
Suddenly he remembered the first time he met Gavin. This gawky British kid with a big nose and crazy hair and a stupid, squeaky laugh, and at the time Michael had no fucking idea that he’d have the power to flip his life completely upside down.  
All those times he said he hated Gavin and wanted to beat the shit out of him, well… they were true, in a sense, but not any truer than the fact that Gavin had come to be the most important thing in his life.  
“I love you too, Gavin.”  
When they came back to the office around an hour later than everyone else, Geoff rolled his eyes and told them to set up camp in the office that night, and Ray gave them a little wink. And none of it really mattered at all because when Gavin sat down beside Michael, he still had that look on his face, and for the billionth time since he’s known him, Michael couldn't help but smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright I'll be honest with you. At this point I'm just procrastinating. This went WAY off course and I kinda hate myself for it but then again, build-up is important. 
> 
> I promise I'll try to get to the damn point in the next chapter. 
> 
> Key word there being TRY.
> 
> Meanwhile, tell me what you think xx


	6. Chapter 6

“Go home, Michael.”  
“It’s the middle of the night, I’m not leaving you.”  
“Geoff’s going to be here any minute, just go.”  
“But—“  
“For fuck’s sake, Michael. Go. Home. I’ll see you on Monday.” Gavin took a few steps towards the curb, facing the direction he knew Geoff was going to come from. Michael shoved his hands in his pockets and started walking the other way, head down, looking at the ground. He couldn’t help but linger at the corner of the hospital building until he saw Gavin getting into the car, finally safe.   
“What the hell happened?” Geoff asked when he turned off the engine, his voice slightly panicked.   
“I fell down some stairs and fractured my wrist.” he replied, trying to keep his own voice steady. It was getting increasingly harder to keep a straight face.  
“Where’s Michael?”  
Gavin just mumbled something about him accidentally leaving the oven on in his apartment. “Can we go home please?”  
The older man just nodded and started the car back up. On their way to the house, Geoff kept side-eyeing him, and when they finally got home and parked, the inside of the car was illuminated by the streetlights, and he noticed Gavin’s eyes were shiny and he was shaking in his seat.  
“Are you crying?”  
“No,” the Brit’s voice was husky. “It just hurts, my eyes are watering.” He got out of the car and quickly made his way into the house.   
“Hey Geoff, thanks for the ride. I’m gonna head to sleep.”  
“Wait,” the older man walked up to him, very close. “What happened?”   
“I told you, I fell down some stairs.”  
Geoff was analyzing his face and Gavin tried so hard not to give anything away, but he was hurt and exhausted, but above all he felt like someone had punched him in the chest and strangled him, and not in a sexy way either.   
He couldn’t help it anymore and suddenly Gavin found himself half in Geoff’s lap on the couch, bawling like a child. The older man had his arms circled around him, rocking gently back and forth, mindful of the hand in a cast. Gavin could feel Griffon’s hand on his leg, some wordless communication between husband and wife obviously happening right above his head but he couldn’t look up, he couldn’t see or breathe or hear and it was horrible. He couldn’t remember the last time he cried and he absolutely had no recollection of it being this disgusting and hard to stop.   
The older man was getting suspicious. He had never seen Gavin actually cry, much less be this upset over anything, really.  
“Gav, tell me what happened.” Geoff’s voice was low and trying for calm, but a concerned quiver was definitely there. “Did Michael hurt you?”  
Gavin just shook his head against his chest. He didn’t trust himself to actually speak.   
“Here, take this.” Griffon appeared out of the kitchen, carrying a glass of water and some sort of medicine in her hand. “It’ll help with the pain and you can go to sleep, okay?”  
Gavin nodded and took it without even questioning her; he knew Griffon had his best interest at heart even though he hated taking any sort of drugs. He struggled to swallow the pill because he couldn’t control his erratic breathing.  
He didn’t know what it was but it didn’t take long until he closed his eyes and suddenly Gavin felt himself being carried then tucked into his bed. He could hear Geoff and Griffon talking.  
“He should be out for the night.” She muttered.  
“I’m gonna call Michael, something’s not right here.”   
Gavin desperately tried to say something, to stop him, but he couldn’t, the fog of sleep and numbness consuming him entirely.  
x x x  
Michael came back to his apartment and paced around the living room with his head in his hands, pulling at his hair.  
“What the fuck is wrong with me?!” he yelled at the ceiling as if it held the answer.   
He stomped over to his open laptop where Gavin’s Facebook was still open and signed in, and the little chat window still loomed in the corner.   
\---Lily Wicks  
hey gav, when u comin home? miss u xoxo  
Michael forcefully closed his laptop shut, the fight still echoing in his head.  
 _“I can’t believe you still talk to her!”_  
 _“We’re mates!”_  
 _“She has a crush on you!”_  
 _“So what? Michael, calm down, it’s not a big deal.”_  
Why. Why did he have to overreact so badly? Why did it take a broken wrist to make him realize how insane he was being?  
Gavin probably hated him now. Properly _hated._ And he couldn’t blame him. Michael fucked it up big time.   
x x x  
“Geoff, seriously, I appreciate it, but I’m fine.” Gavin said as his friend fussed over him on their way to the office on Monday.  
“You keep saying that.” Geoff stood in his way in the parking lot. “But you were _crying,_ Gavin. I don’t know how to deal with that. And why did Michael not come over to visit you?”  
Gavin groaned. “We had a fight, okay? I broke my wrist and he got me to the emergency room and then I told him to go home. Stop obsessing.”  
“Do you want me to talk to him?”  
“I can handle it, Geoffrey.” He said with finality and pushed past him. When they walked into the office, only Ray and Jack were there.   
Gavin had to go through his mantra of “I fell down some stairs” about five hundred more times when everyone in the goddamn building came over to ask him what happened.   
Michael came in late, looking like he’d seen hell with his own eyes. Geoff immediately stood up but Gavin shot him a look.  
“Can we go outside to talk?” Michael asked in a hushed voice. Gavin didn’t really want to, but he didn’t want to make a scene either.   
They walked quietly to the parking lot and just stood there for a while, not saying anything.   
“You look like shite.” Gavin remarked mercilessly. Michael flinched, but he knew he deserved it.   
“I haven’t slept. Look…”  
“To be honest with you, I don’t really wanna hear it.”  
“Please, Gavin. I’m so sorry.”  
“I have work to do.” Gavin turned around and made a move to leave. Michael reached out to stop him. “Gav—“  
“Don’t _fucking_ touch me.” He shook off Michael’s hand.   
He put his hands up as a sign of surrender. “Please, Gavin, I have no idea what to do. I fucked up. Please tell me what to do to make it right.” He was getting desperate, Gavin’s face showed no signs of forgiveness. His jaw was clenched. “I love you, please let me make it okay.” Michael never in his life thought he’d be reduced to this, to begging for forgiveness, but every bone in his body ached and he felt like there was a giant weight on his chest, crushing his ribcage, and the only thing that could make him be able to breathe again would be Gavin saying that it’s going to be alright. There was a huge lump in Michael’s throat as Gavin just kept staring at him like he was the scum of the earth, and he knew he completely deserved it, but it didn’t hurt any less.  
“I have work to do.” Gavin repeated and disappeared into the building without saying another word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It hurts me, it physically hurts me. 
> 
> Tell me what you thought about that because I'm seriously distraught by this. These two shits are ruining my life


	7. Chapter 7

The next week was unbearable, to put it lightly. Gavin avoided Michael like the plague, and he, in turn, didn't want to corner him for fear of another terrifying reaction.  
Geoff gave them their space. They'd luckily recorded enough footage previously to let them get on with editing and separate recordings. But on Friday, Geoff asked Michael to speak to him in private. They went to the empty conference room and sat down, Michael avoiding his gaze.  
"Look, I don't know what the hell happened between you two, but you have to sort it out. Fast."  
"I'm trying."  
"Well it's not working."  
"Yeah, no shit."  
"Gavin's been acting weird. He goes home and straight to his room, he refuses to talk to anyone."  
Michael's chest hurt.  
"You look like hell, by the way."  
"Thanks, Geoff." He glared. But he knew, and he wasn't surprised. He'd slept maybe a total of five hours in the last week. It was showing.  
"Just... Take care of it, okay? You two are bringing the whole office down."  
Michael nodded solemnly. "I'll try."  
x x x  
"Have you broken up?" Ray asked him in a gentle voice. He'd come over for pizza and videogames, but Michael's joints didn't seem to work and he had no appetite to speak of.  
"No." He replied, but then immediately backtracked. "I don't know. He won't talk to me."  
Michael could feel the bomb ticking. Every time he couldn't get Gavin to talk to him, he felt like he was slipping away.  
On Monday Gavin didn't show up. He texted him, asking if he was okay, but he wasn't surprised he didn't reply. He hadn't replied to any of his texts since the incident.  
He hadn't wanted to, but Michael asked Geoff.  
"Oh, buddy...you don't know?" Geoff's face looked like he was talking to a child who'd been beaten up.  
"Don't know what? Is he okay?"  
"Yeah, he's... with Burnie, in England. Gav said he'd asked him to go with a while ago, but it was a last minute thing. I thought he told you."  
"Oh."  
"It's really that bad, huh?" Geoff didn't want to pry, but the curiosity was burning him. Gavin was a brick wall any time he brought it up.  
"Yeah... How long for is he gone?"  
"Like a week and a half."  
Michael took a deep breath. This wasn't good.  
"Why are they there anyway?"  
"Well Burnie's talking to UK merch distributors and shit, and Gav's filming something... I think."  
Gavin wasn't online once. On day 7 Michael was resorted to asking Burnie about him, but even he didn't give him a straightforward answer.  
 _\---Burnie please just tell me he's okay_  
 _\--I'm keeping an eye on him_  
Michael couldn't say he knew Burnie head to toe, but he knew him well enough to recognize that he was avoiding the topic. "Keeping an eye on him" didn't mean Gavin was okay. It meant he needed to be taken care of. And it was Michael's fault. He should be the one taking care of him, he shouldn’t be the cause.  
x x x  
"Please, Gavin, talk to me. It's been three weeks."  
"What do you want me to say?"  
"Anything. Just talk to me. I have no idea how you are, I don't even know if we're still together or not."  
Gavin just stared at him blankly.  
"So is this it? You're not going to say anything?"  
Not a muscle in Gavin’s face moved.  
He watched Michael turn around and walk away without another word. It created a weird sensation in his chest, like thousands of sharp needles were piercing his insides, and if Gavin wasn’t so stubborn, maybe he would have said something. Maybe it would be easier to breathe.  
Maybe Michael’s vision wouldn’t be blurry as he walked away, and maybe, just maybe, everything would be alright.  
But rain is wet, sugar is sweet, Gavin is stubborn and Michael is clueless. And there was nothing anyone could do about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was as tiny as my non-existent dick but please bear with me!
> 
> Also I know angsty shite like this isn't everyone's cup of tea so if you hate it and you're still reading this, then go you. I like you. x
> 
> Tell me what you think in the comments xx


	8. There Are Wounds That Are Not Meant To Heal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And they say to cry is to know that you're alive  
> But my river of tears has run dry  
> I never wanted to fool you, no  
> A cold heart is a dead heart  
> And it feels like I've been buried alive by love

The weeks dragged on. It wasn’t the same at the office; there was none of the playful, loving banter reverberating off the green walls or furniture being broken. It was just… calm. Geoff couldn’t be mad though because to their credit, Michael and Gavin were complete professionals when they recorded videos. They acted so good that sometimes, during recordings, Geoff caught himself having forgotten that the two went through an awful break-up. Sometimes he did notice that Michael was a bit quieter and Gavin a bit more snarky than before, but it wasn’t anything the audience picked up on. Team Nice Dynamite lived on, but team Michael Jones and Gavin Free had all but built a brick wall between them.  
x x x  
“Gavin?” Geoff’s voice sounded from behind his door.  
“Closed for maintenance, go away.” He responded, half paying attention, trying to play Assassin’s Creed.  
Geoff groaned and went in anyway. He stood behind Gavin, sitting on the floor, immersed in the game.  
“Let’s go out, have drinks.”  
“No.”  
“You haven’t left this room in weeks!”  
“I go to work.”  
“That doesn’t count.”  
Gavin didn’t respond.  
“Alright, you big baby.” Geoff rolled his eyes and the next thing Gavin knew, he was being picked up by his underarms and his earphones were ripped off. "Time to go out and play. Barbara's here, too. Take a shower and get dressed."  
Eventually they did coax Gavin out of his hidey-hole and they went to a bar. Geoff intentionally didn't invite anyone else; it was just him, Gavin, Griffon and Barbara. He didn't want Gavin to be overwhelmed.  
They started off with beer but pretty soon they decided to move on to tequila. Griffon settled on Redbull though, she was the designated driver.  
Gavin was pretty sulky at the start of the night but he seemed to loosen up with every drink. He even ended up dancing with Barbara a couple of hours in.  
"Aw, there it is!" Geoff commented when the two came back to their table, flushed and giggling about their antics on the dancefloor.  
"What?" Gavin asked.  
"That goofy smile of yours."  
Griffon reached over and half-hugged him, rubbing his forearm. "I'm going to the bar, do you want a funny cocktail?" drinking those ridiculous multicoloured cocktails with the little umbrellas in them always seemed to make him laugh, and they all really just wanted to see Gavin not be sad for an extended period of time. That, and they had news to break to him, and they had no idea how he'd react.  
Initially, Barbara was the one who found out. She'd been chatting to one of the new interns who was helping out with animation and such, Serena. She'd only been at the office for about two or three weeks, but Barbara wanted to get to know her, if anything just to be nice.  
Barbara casually asked if she was seeing anyone and she very enthusiastically said she'd gone on a few dates with Michael.  
She didn't really know what to do. Should she tell Gavin? Did he already know?  
Ultimately she decided to go to Geoff's that evening to talk about it. Barbara knew that if there was anyone who could handle the situation, it was the Ramseys.  
The three of them decided it was best not to waste any more time. Their plan was to get Gavin as relaxed as he could be and then tell him themselves, because who knows how he would find out otherwise.  
And that's how they found themselves huddled close together, trying to make some last minute decisions when Gavin returned from the bathroom and asked what they were talking about.  
Geoff stood up and led him to an empty booth in the corner of the room where they could talk, just the two of them.  
"I don't know how to break it to you, buddy..." Geoff's eyes were downcast and he was fiddling nervously with a napkin. "I actually don't even know if you'll care, but I didn't... Ugh, I don't know, I just thought you have a right to know. Maybe you already know?"  
"What the hell are you on about, Geoff? Know what?"  
And as he told him, he watched a number of emotions flash across Gavin's face. And just as Geoff had feared, none of them were positive or even just neutral. Finally after a few moments he just settled on a steely, cold expression.  
"I'm gonna go get a drink."  
Geoff watched him go to the bar and looked back at their booth, signaling Barbara to go after him.  
"Six shots of tequila." Gavin ordered as his friend came up and placed an arm around his waist in quiet support. Barbara thought he'd ordered the shots for the table, but then Gavin just stood at the bar and downed all six of them back to back, completely bypassing the salt and lime.  
"I need some fresh air." He announced.  
"Can I come with?"  
Gavin just shrugged and made his way out the door, with Barbara in tow.  
He stood with his hands buried in his pockets, looking up at the dark evening sky, taking deep breaths as he felt the alcohol slowly but persistently taking over. It did nothing to calm his thoughts, but it made them less coherent and maybe soon enough they'd go away completely.  
Barbara got him talking. First about meaningless things like how hot it was getting and how shit the parking for the bar was, but then eventually Barbara got him to talk about Michael. She figured it'd make him feel better about the whole thing if he just talked. So she listened.  
Gavin went on about how jealous Michael was, even when they just started dating, and how it got progressively worse.  
"So that's why you broke up with him?"  
"Yeah..." Gavin inhaled deeply. Fuck it, he thought. Fuck him. He was tired of keeping this huge secret and way too drunk to remind himself of what a mess he could be causing. "Remember when I fractured my wrist?"  
Barbara furrowed her brows. "Yeah?”  
“Well…”  
Gavin proceeded to tell her the whole story. How he’d left his Facebook window open when he went to the bathroom at Michael’s one day, how he saw Lily’s message, and then how Michael went completely insane and they had a huge fight that ended with him going to the ER. He didn’t trip and fracture his wrist. It was all Michael.  
“Oh.” Barbara was shocked, to say the least. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?”  
“Because I knew Geoff would overreact and it just wouldn’t end well. It’s not that big a deal, I was just mad at him.”  
“Well, yeah, of course you were! That’s horrible, what he did.”  
“Yeah, yeah, it’s not the point though. I don’t know, I can’t explain it.” Gavin looked down at his feet. His vision was blurry. He was beginning to slur his words. “I just wish... ugh, nothing. Anyway… don’t tell anyone, okay? I don’t want him to lose his job or something.”  
“You still love him, don’t you?” Barbara inquired gently.  
Gavin just groaned and rolled his eyes, staggering in place. And that was as good as a “yes” in her book.  
“Come on, let’s get you inside.”  
More drinks were had and Geoff, Griffon and Barbara watched over Gavin like hawks, but he was just quiet. Nobody could see that beneath the somewhat calm exterior his blood was boiling and he was damn near flipping the table over.  
He excused himself to go to the bathroom. It was a pretty small bar so he had the little room to himself. Gavin locked the door and just stood there, leaning on the sink with his head hanging, trying to steady himself, trying not to explode.  
He took a few deep breaths but they did nothing to soothe him. Eventually he just thought “Fuck it.” and staggered outside.  
Gavin took his phone out of his pocket and scrolled through his list of favorite contacts. He never bothered taking Michael off it. Or changing his name from when Ray got a hold of his phone and jokingly saved it as “Micool<3~!” all those months ago.  
He patiently listened to the beeps.  
But what he heard wasn’t what Gavin was expecting.  
“Hello?” a female voice said.  
It’s her. It’s fucking her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Normal length chapter! Sorry that the previous one had to be so short. 
> 
> As always, I'm dying to hear what you think. Don't be shy, comment xx


	9. Chapter 9

By the time Geoff, Barbara and Griffon realized that Gavin’s been gone a little too long, it was already too late. First they scanned the bar, then Geoff went to check the bathrooms, and when they finally went outside to look for him, they found Gavin screaming into his phone.  
What was meant to be a sarcastic “Good luck with your new girlfriend” call quickly turned into something far more aggressive.   
“Does he choke on your name when he comes? Does he fucking kiss you for hours because he just can’t get enough? I fucking hope you--”  
“Woah, woah, Gavin!” Geoff wrestled the phone away from him and gave it to Barbara. He tried to calm him down but Gavin was fighting his grip, still yelling.   
Barbara put the phone to her ear and she heard something that sounded horrifyingly similar to crying. “Serena? Is that you?” But she’d already hung up, and Barbara saw that it was Michael’s number that he’d called. It was pretty clear what had happened.   
“Calm down, Gavin!” Griffon was trying to soothe him by stroking his hair as Geoff held him back, but he was having none of it.   
“Get him in the car.”   
Somewhere between thrashing around in front of the bar and being sat down in the car, quite a long walk away, Gavin just gave up and started sobbing violently. He was trying to say something, but no words came out, so Geoff stayed in the backseat with him, letting him fall and lie on his lap, hugging him as best as he could as Barbara softly spoke to him from the front seat, trying to calm him down.   
It took nearly an hour to get home, and when they pulled up to the house, someone was standing there on the porch. They realized that it was Michael, who stormed over to the car, opened the door and all but ripped Gavin out of his seat. He took him by the collar and slammed him against the truck.   
“You fucking _asshole!_ ”   
Geoff rushed over and pulled him off, and as he wrestled Michael away he saw Gavin sink down onto the ground. Griffon ran over to try to help him up.  
“Michael! Calm down.” Geoff stood in front of him with his hands firmly on his shoulders, still trying to prevent a beating.   
“Don’t tell me to fucking calm down, this motherfucking asshole—“  
“I know, I know! He’s drunk, he doesn’t know up from down, he’ll apologize in the morning. Stop trying to strangle him.”  
“Michael.” Barbara appeared and dragged him away by the arm. When he saw that Michael wasn’t going to run over and punch Gavin any second, Geoff went over to help Griffon get him into the house. He was still a sobbing mess, resisting their help.  
“What do you _want?_ ”  
“Fucking listen to me.”   
Michael glared at her, still shaking with rage.   
“Look, I know that what Gavin just did was fucking stupid and insensitive but you owe him a normal conversation.”  
“I don’t fucking owe him anything.”  
“Yeah you do. He told me what you did.”  
Michael’s eyes widened.   
“Yeah. I know.” Barbara was still processing the information herself but more than anything, she just wanted this mess to be over with. “If anything, you owe him an apology. He’s clearly not over it. Did you see him? Gav’s a mess.”   
Suddenly, all the rage just seeped out of Michael and he was left with the guilt that had been holding him captive for months.  
“I apologized a million times, what more can I do?”  
“Maybe you didn't say what he wanted to hear.”  
“He won’t tell me! I tried to talk to him but he never said anything.”  
“Well then figure it out! He’s obviously still in love with you, he’s just waiting for you to do the right thing.”  
“I have no idea what “the right thing” is.”  
Barbara took a deep breath and tried to organize her thoughts. “Look… go home, think about it, I’ll get Gavin to come and talk to you tomorrow.”  
“He won’t want to.”  
“I’ll make him, I don’t care. You two have to settle this like adults.”  
Michael nodded, collecting his thoughts. “Does Geoff know?”  
“No, and I won’t tell because Gav asked me not to. He doesn’t want you to lose your job.”  
Michael was silent, contemplating. Gavin was still looking out for him. Even after all that.   
“You’re scared of _Geoff,_ did you even think of what Dan would do if he found out?”  
He frowned, imagining it. As Michael turned around, he saw Geoff carrying Gavin inside. “Please just get him to talk to me.”  
x x x  
It took a bit of persuading and assuring Gavin that Michael wasn’t going to rip his head off but ultimately he wanted to go talk to Michael, if anything just to apologize.   
Barbara had stayed over and in the morning helped him recover from his hangover. Once his nasty headache somewhat went away and they got his face to stop swelling, they drove over to Michael’s.   
_\--Me and Gav are on our way over_  
 _\---Thank you_  
“I have to run a few errands not far from here, will you be alright?”  
“Yeah.”  
“Call me when you need me to pick you up.”  
“Thanks, Barb.”   
Gavin stood on the curb as Barbara drove away, looking up at Michael’s window. He took a deep breath. “Well, here goes nothing.”  
He didn’t know why but he was surprised that Michael’s apartment looked exactly the same as it did the last time he was there, before they broke up. It wasn't _that_ long ago, but for some reason he expected it to feel alien and different, but it didn't. Michael waved Gavin to sit down.  
“Do you want some coffee? I just made it.”  
He was still feeling a bit groggy, so he thankfully accepted it.   
As soon as they were both sitting down, a silence fell. And Gavin couldn’t stand it, so he spoke first.  
“Look, I’m sorry about yesterday. I went a bit mental. I’ll… uh, apologize to your girlfriend, too, when I see her.”   
“She’s not my girlfriend. We’re not even dating; we hung out like three times. That’s it. I’m not interested in the least.”  
“Oh…” Gavin mulled it over. “Well, she told Barbara you went on a few dates with her.” He tried not to sound like he was accusing Michael of anything. He knew full well that they were not together, haven’t been in a while, and he definitely had the right to date whoever he wanted. But that didn’t stop the buzzing in Gavin’s head.  
“Oh well, it doesn’t matter. I don’t think she’ll ever talk to me again.”  
“My bad.”  
“Eh, I don’t really care. I mean she’s nice and all but… I don’t know, whatever. I was just mad that you made her actually _cry_. What the hell did you say?”  
Gavin shrugged. “I don’t really remember to be honest. I was _well_ out of it.”  
They both sipped on their hot coffee for a minute, frankly surprised that they were managing to have a normal conversation. If they were being civil, Michael thought this would be the perfect opportunity to get some other things figured out, too. “So where does that leave us?”  
“Hmm?”   
“Well, uh… clearly you’re still mad about the whole thing. And, you know, you have a right to be, but… god.” Michael ran a hand through his hair. “I miss you. I know I still see you every day, but it fucking sucks that you only talk to me when you have to. It’s too quiet. You never fully moved in here but the place is really damn empty without you. So I, uh… I don’t know. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry that I overreacted, but I hope you know that I’m fucking paying for it, every goddamn day.”  
Gavin looked him directly in the eyes for the first time. “You still don’t get it.”  
“Don’t get what?”  
“Why I was mad.”  
“Because I broke your wrist?”  
“No, you idiot! Well, yeah, that. But that’s like number three on the list. I was upset because you thought that me and Lily talking meant anything. Like… so what if she fancies me. That doesn’t mean I’m gonna do anything about it or that I’m even interested. You never trusted me, _that’s_ what got on my tits.”  
“Oh.” Michael had never thought about it. “What’s number two?”  
“That you looked at my messages! I hate that, and you know it.”  
“It was right there! You left your laptop two inches away from me on the couch, the message popped, I literally just turned my head and saw it.”  
“Whatever, still!”  
“So that’s why you were mad? Why did you never tell me?”  
“I don’t know. I was too pissed at you to explain. I wanted you to figure it out yourself.”  
“I’m not a mind reader! How was I supposed to know?”  
They went back and forth for quite a while, but it didn’t feel like a fight. It felt more like their usual mildly annoying banter, more like the Michael and Gavin they used to be.   
“Okay, whatever!” Gavin shook his head. “Basically, I’m tired of being mad at you. It takes way too much effort to hate you.”  
Michael looked up hopefully.   
“I’m willing to forget about it and try again, if you are.”   
“Really?”  
“If you stop being such a jealous little monkey, that is.”  
“I can do that.” Michael nodded vehemently and they looked at each other, smiling. “So we’re good?”   
“Yeah, we’re good.”  
Gavin leaned in to kiss him and the response he got was breathtaking. Usually he was the clingy one, but Michael dragged him into his lap and wound his arms around his torso, holding on for dear life. “I missed you so much.” He said between kisses.   
“I missed you too, Michael.”   
It went on and on, just this stupid gropey teenage kissing, punctuated by hushed giggles and big smiles, but it felt so good to be finally back in each other’s arms, where it’s warm and familiar.   
Gavin eventually went up for air. “I’m all for make-up sex and all that but I’m absolutely knackered, to be honest.” He still wasn’t really over his hangover and the last two days had been quite emotionally draining, to say the least.  
“Yeah, I haven’t really slept either. Bed?”  
“I’ll be with you in one sec.” Gavin took his phone and quickly typed up a text to Barbara.  
 _\--I’m staying. Thanks for the help, Barb_  
They arranged themselves just like they used to, with Gavin resting his head on Michael’s chest, hugging him close, and him gently playing with Gavin’s hair until they both drifted off.   
When they woke up the sun had already set, but Michael made Gavin “breakfast”. He watched Gavin wander around all sleepy and cute, hair messy and sticking out every which way, ranting about his seemingly never-ending headache and “stupid American telly”, and suddenly Michael was overwhelmed by a feeling he had long ago, the same weird sensation he had before asking Gavin out on their first date. Only this time he understood what it was.  
 _Home._  
With Gavin there, he felt like home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIN.
> 
> I don't think I'll be writing a sequel to this, I've pretty much gotten everything I can from this story. 
> 
> If you have any questions, anything that's unclear, feel free to ask! 
> 
> And I'd love love love to hear your thoughts on the whole thing. 
> 
> If you've enjoyed my scribblings, check back in the near future~ I don't have anything planned _yet_ but I'm not done with these idiots. xxx


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